The Drunk and the Hime
by Brii-sama
Summary: Rated only for it's yaoi. Lee finally admits his true feelings to the one he loves.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto or it's characters, as much as that pains me.

A/N: I have no idea where this came from. …Screw it.

Chapter One: Raikou, Chinsui Rock Lee! (Enter, Very Drunk Rock Lee!)

Neji couldn't believe his ears. Neither could Tenten or Lee. The kunoichi of the group spoke up.

"Uh…Gai-sensei? Is it really the best idea to train Lee in the Drunken Fist?" The man in green did not seem to find a flaw in his plan.

"Of course! This will be the ultimate test of _youth_!" For some reason, every time Gai said his plan would involve youth, no matter how stupid, idiotic, suicidal, humiliating or ridiculous the plan actually _was_, Lee would immediately loose all common sense and agree with everything said after the word _youth_. Neji desperately wanted to know what was so great about the stupid word. Tenten had given up and started using it to manipulate both men. It was kind of scary how it worked even on Gai.

Lee struck up the 'nice guy pose', as it had been dubbed (it had also been dubbed the 'thumb pose' by Kakashi and Neji) and grinned. The evil sparkly glinted off his teeth and Neji lunged forward, grabbing it. He didn't know why, but the sparkly bugged him to absolutely no end. Every time he saw it, he would try to grab it. Several times he had been successful and now had a box full of sparklies. He opened his hands and poked the sparkly before pocketing it. Lee, now used to it, turned back to his idol. Gai and Tenten, not used to it, stared at the Hyuuga.

"Yosh! Gai-sensei! When do we start?" Still confused about the grab-the-friggin'-sparkly-game, it took Gai a second or two to turn back to his adorable student.

"We will start now! Tenten-chan and Neji-kun shall be your sparring partners!" Having said this, Gai produced two bottles of sake and handed them to Lee.

"Remember! Drink them as fast as you can! You only have a few seconds before you get drunk! You two get ready!" Neji and Tenten fell into fighting positions as Lee downed the first bottle and Gai retreated hastily to a safe distance. Lee made a face and downed the second bottle in record time. His arms fell limp and he swayed back and forth.

"Woo…I feel woozy…" He blinked his eyes, and tried to see straight. Neji and Tenten exchanged glances before leaping forward, ready to attack. Without warning, Lee grabbed Tenten's arm and hurled her into a tree. He grabbed Neji's arm and the Hyuuga prepared for the same fate. Instead, he was cradled gently as Lee leaned over him.

"Ah, beautiful hime (princess), you do not need to fight! I will protect you!"

_Whoa. Didn't see this coming._

Placing Neji down, Lee began to fight Tenten and Gai. Neji swore and stood to join the fight, only to be picked up and carried into a branch.

"My lovely hime, how I long for you! Wait for me and I shall come! Excuse me a moment." The brunette could only sit and stare as Lee thoroughly trounced their sensei and teammate without so much as breaking a sweat. Neji leapt down from the branch and once again tried to fight, but Lee appeared in front of him, on one knee. The Hyuuga's unbandaged hand was taken in Lee's.

"My exquisite Neji-hime, would you marry me?" Gai and Tenten froze and stared. No one was quite sure what to say. Neji felt his brain shut down and refuse to start up again. Finally, his head moved for him, nodding dumbly. Drunk Lee's whole face brightened (quite considerably) and he leapt up.

"Then let the meeting of our lips be a sign of our love!"

_Please tell me he's not going to-yup._

Lee kissed him. Now Neji's brain turned in a five-second notice, shut down, crawled into his room and refused to come out. Neji's eyes grew huge and all the blood in his body moved to his face.

_Oh my_ GOD _I'm never going to live this down!_

"Yosh! I shall now protect my ethereal hime with all my might!" As soon as Lee went back to asskicking Tenten and Gai, Neji fell to the ground, unable to think straight.

_Lee…propose…kiss…hime…help…_

Once Neji got moving again, he tried several times to fight Lee in his drunken stupor. They were unsuccessful. After what felt like several hours (but was only one) Lee got a hangover and fell to the ground, groaning.

"Ow…" Tenten and Gai were hiding behind a tree, panting. Neji was stuck in a tree, bound by badly aimed wires. Lee had been about to save him when the sake wore off.

_Great. The one time him falling head over heels for me could be useful and he gets a frickin' hangover._

"Uh…guys? A little help would be appreciated." Lee seemed to shake off the pain and leapt up to his friend.

"Neji-san! How did you get in this predicament?"

"…You don't remember anything that happened while you were drunk?" The bowl-headed ninja cocked his head.

"No. Why?" Blushing faintly, Neji avoided looking him in the eyes.

"N-no reason."

_Damn. Wait, damn? When did damn sneak in there? Bad damn! Go away!_

"Neji-san, you don't seem to have fought very much. Are you feeling all right?"

_Damn it, I hoped he wouldn't ask! Well, I can't lie now._

"You…you wouldn't let me fight." Lee, whom had been undoing the wires, suddenly stopped and frowned.

"I didn't? Why?" Tenten and Gai, having caught their breaths, were watching a bit smugly. They wanted to see what the great Hyuuga Neji would do in such a situation. Neji opted to glare at them briefly.

"You…I mean…I…you kept…calling me…uh…well you…"

_What the Hell is wrong with me? I'm the great Hyuuga Neji! I'm a freaking ninja genius! How come I can't lie to him? It's not like he's the nicest, most sincere and honest guy I know! It's not like he visited me in the hospital everyday and brought me flowers when I was hurt! It's not like he's my best friend in the whole world! It's not like that stupid smile of his makes me feel all soft inside! It's not like that at all! …Oh Hell. I'm crushing on my best friend! On Lee! The guy called fuzzy eyebrows by a demon kid! The guy who looses it over the word youth! The guy who…who…WHO LOOKS LIKE MINI-GAI!_

"Youcalledmehimeandkeptrescuingmeandproposedtomeeventhoughit'sunofficialanddoesn'tcountbecauseyouweredrunkanddidn'tknowwhatyouweredoingandeventhoughIsaidyesthatstilldoesn'tmakeitofficialIwasjustalittleconfusedthat'sallsoifyoucoulduntiemeI'dbegrateful!" There was silence as Neji began to take in every detail of his shoes. Lee, who apparently had a video camera for a brain paused, rewound, and played what Neji had said in slow motion.

"…Oh." There was a long, uncomfortable silence. Lee began untying the wire again, finally getting it loose. The two jumped down to the ground together, no one saying anything. Neji shifted his feet a bit uncomfortably, and then looked up.

"Well, I'm going home. See you tomorrow, I guess."

"Wait, Neji." The Hyuuga froze as Lee grabbed his wrist. He slowly turned back around. The setting sun cast a reddish glow on Lee's face as he went down on one knee in front of Neji.

"You said that didn't count. But this one does." Reaching into his pack, Lee pulled out a black velvet box.

"Hyuuga Neji…" He held it up a bit and opened the box to reveal an elegant silver band with a diamond engraved into the ring.

"Would you marry me?" The sound of Tenten and Gai's jaws hitting the ground was fairly loud. Neji's mouth fell open a bit and his cheeks turned bright red. _No one_ had ever been so serious about loving him. Sure, he had a fan club. But they just loved his looks. Lee was dead serious about wanting to marry him. The Hyuuga didn't know what to say. Never before had he come across a situation even remotely close to this. He, the great Hyuuga Neji, freaking ninja genius, was at a loss of what to do. He looked into Lee's big, black eyes and came across a decision.

"…Yes. Yes I will marry you." There was dead silence for several seconds. Lee's mind tipped over. No doubt, the bushy browed boy hadn't thought Neji would actually say _yes_, even if he had really hoped he would. Finally, he pulled the ring from the box and slipped it on Neji's finger. Neji cocked his head and smiled a bit.

"Do I get a kiss?" That was like saying youth. Lee sprung up, cradled Neji in his arms, and kissed him passionately on the lips. Wrapping his arms around the boy, the Hyuuga vaguely wondered how his family would react. Then again, he really didn't care. He was in love. When they pulled apart, Gai struck the 'thumb pose'.

"Yosh! In honor of Neji and Lee's youth, I shall treat you all to dinner!" Tenten began to clap.

"Congratulations, you two. It certainly took you long enough." Lee blushed while Neji opted for sticking his tongue out at her. And kissing Lee again.

I'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'maline 

Dinner went by without mishap (except Lee stood up and declared his love for Neji to the restaurant) and Neji found himself standing in front of his house. He had gone over in his head how his uncle would react to the news of his getting married and come up with a few scenarios.

Scenario One: He would stare at Neji in shock and then die from heart attack.

Scenario Two: He would stare at Neji in shock and then start screaming at him, forbidding the marriage.

Scenario Three: He would stare at Neji in shock and then disown him.

Scenario Four: He would stare at Neji in shock and then kill him.

Scenario Five: He would stare at Neji in shock and then force him to marry Hinata.

Scenario Six: He would stare at Neji in shock, then tie him down and go kill Lee.

Scenario Seven: He would stare at Neji in shock and then magical dancing squirrels would come in and carry Neji away.

Though it was unlikely, he really hoped it would be the seventh scenario. He liked squirrels. Taking a deep breath and steeling himself, Neji pushed the door open and stepped out of his shoes.

"I'm home." His uncle, sitting at the table with Hinata and several members of the clan, glanced back at him briefly.

"How was your day?"

"Great. We finished a mission, did a bit of training, I got engaged, we went out for dinner and I came home."

"That's ni-what." Neji flinched and took another deep breath, squaring his shoulders and looking straight at his uncle. Said head of Hyuuga clan turned back to stare at him. Hinata looked up from her needlepoint and blinked in surprise.

"En…gaged?"

"To who?" The whole 'I'm Tough and Macho' thing wasn't working as well as he had hoped.

"Rock Lee." There was silence as his uncle digested the fact and tried to remember who Rock Lee was.

"The…fuzzy eyebrows boy?"

"…Yes." There was another bought of silence until Hinata burst into a fit of giggles. The giggles quickly evolved into hysterical laughter. Neji wasn't quite sure what she was laughing at: the fact that he was engaged to Lee, how her father had called Lee the 'fuzzy eyebrows boy', or the looks on the faces of the rest of the clan. All were pretty funny. Neji's uncle looked at Hinata, who couldn't stop laughing no matter how hard she tried. She wasn't trying very hard anyway.

"Hinata-chan…" Still laughing, the girl stood and stumbled into the next room. She was laughing so hard she was crying and she couldn't breath. She collapsed into the next room, closing the door with her foot. She was still laughing. Her father turned his lavender eyes back to Neji.

"What if I were to say you couldn't marry him?" Neji answered without missing a beat.

"I'd go to Suna and elope."

"You love him that much?"

"Yes."

"You trust him?"

"With my life."

"If you had to choose between your clan and him, who would you choose?"

"If I had to, I would choose Lee." The male's eyebrows leapt up a bit. Neji felt his chest tighten. The other clan members gasped in shock. There was a long silence between the head of the clan and Neji. The boy felt as though the whole world was judging him right then and there. Finally, Hinata's father turned back to his tea and spoke.

"The wedding may be held here." Neji blinked in surprise.

"You mean…"

"You have my blessings." Neji felt his whole face light up with glee. It must have been scary for everyone else, because it was real glee. He lunged forward and hugged his uncle around the neck.

"Thank you so much, uncle! I'll go tell Lee now!" He ran to the front door, pulling his shoes on and running off as quickly as humanly possibly. Or as ninja-ly possible, actually. Hinata's father grinned and looked into his cup. The entire clan stared at him, mouths open in shock.

"…I think I'll go get more tea."

End of Chapter One

A/N: …I had fun writing that.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Well. Here I am again. Cause I got a review. Also, I don't speak Japanese so don't go dissing my titles. And, since people are probably confused, they're eighteen. Everyone's a jounin and Sasuke's still with Orochimaru.

**SilverWing129:** Agreed. Thanks for the review. Here's a cookie and another chapter.

Chapter Two: Yosh! Engumi Tameni Hyuuga Neji ken Rock Lee! Nimo, Shikamaru no Tsumori! (Alright! A Wedding for Hyuuga Neji and Rock Lee! Also, Shikamaru has a Plan!)

It was five days after Lee had proposed to Neji. It was five days after Neji said yes. By now, the word had spread. Shikamaru and Chouji, whom had been cloud-watching on a roof above Neji and Lee, heard about the wedding plans and told Shino and Kiba. Shino and Kiba, along with Hinata who already knew, told Naruto, Sakura and Ino. Naruto, happy they had finally hooked up, told Kakashi, Iruka, Tsunade, and then ran all the way to Suna to tell Gaara. Gaara told Temari and Kankurou, who followed him to Konoha to attend the wedding. At the moment, Neji, Lee, Gaara, Naruto, Gai and Tenten were headed for Neji's house. They were on the committee of setting everything up.

"The garden would be perfect for the ceremony." Lee nodded and checked off something on his list.

"And the back courtyard is big enough for the reception." Gaara, looking over Lee's shoulder, pointed to something.

"Temari's doing the outfits. She's already got the measurements."

"Really? When did she do that?"

"Beats me. She managed to make my entire wardrobe without actually touching me." The group exchanged looks and shrugged. Lee scratched outfits off the list. Naruto tapped his chin in thought.

"Iruka-sensei said he and Ebiki-san would take care of the cake and food, Kurenai-sensei and Anko-san said they would take care of flowers…what's left?" Lee marked off two more things and went down the list.

"Not much, thankfully. We've got the time, the place, we need the invitations…" Neji opened the door to his house, only to find all the lights out.

"What the-? Where is everyone?" As soon as he flipped on the light, the entire Hyuuga clan leapt out from various hiding spots.

"MAZEL TOV!"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Naruto leapt straight into Gaara's arms, Neji doing the same with Lee. Tenten and Gai pulled out their weapons, ready to attack. Everyone in the room laughed at them. Neji turned beet red and began yelling at them.

"Don't do that! You scared the living daylights out of me!" Neji's uncle (who's name I have yet to remember) laughed.

"Haven't you ever heard of a surprise party, Neji?" The boy grumbled quietly.

"It should be against the law to throw a surprise party for a ninja." Hinata smiled coyly, mimicking her father.

"It got you into the arms of your betrothed, ne, Neji-onii-chan?" Blushing furiously, Neji climbed out of Lee's arms. Gaara reluctantly let Naruto go and the proper engagement party was thrown. There was sake, but Neji forbid Lee from having any. When the bushy-brows complained, Neji whispered something to him that made him blush and shut up immediately. Later, Naruto and Gaara asked the Hyuuga what he had said.

"I told him I wanted him to be sober when he took my virginity."

I'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'amlineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'maline 

By now, Shikamaru had hatched a cunning and devious PLAN.

He shared the idea with Neji and Lee, who agreed to help him. They also got the help of Tsunade and several jounin. Now all he had to do was deliver an invitation.

_Coming here sounded better in my head._

The lazy nin stood in front of Orochimaru's hideout, hands jammed deeply into his pockets. It had been decided he would go alone, since too many people would make Orochimaru suspicious. Shrugging, Shikamaru pushed the doors opened and walked in. He strolled casually down the halls, showing he had no intention of fighting anyone.

"Hello? Hello! Anyone here? I need to speak to the Uchiha!" When he got no answer, he grumbled.

_Thought something like this would happen._

Suddenly, Kabuto appeared from the shadows.

"What is it you want, Shikamaru-kun?" Without flinching, the boy turned around and shrugged.

"Thought I just said it. I want to talk to Sasuke."

"…Why?" Shikamaru yawned and looked around lazily.

"I've got an invitation for him."

"I will take it to him."

"Nope." Kabuto raised an eyebrow and his hand inched closer to his kunai.

"Oh?"

"My orders were to bring it to him personally. It's for something special." The silver-haired jounin was about to tell him to bug off, but Orochimaru's voice cut through the hallway.

"Let him talk to Sasuke, Kabuto." There was a hint of maniacal glee in his voice. Well, there was always a hint of maniacal glee in his voice, except when things didn't go his way. But this time it was different. It wasn't…malicious maniacal glee. It was…um…nevermind. There was just something different about the way he said it. Reluctantly, Kabuto lead Shikamaru to Orochimaru's…throne room. Sasuke was leaning against the chair Orochimaru sat in, his eyes watching the other ninja in a bored manner.

"What do you want." Grinning, Shikamaru pulled out an invitation.

"It's for you." Narrowing his eyes in suspicion, the Uchiha took the envelope and opened it. Inside was a prettily decorated card.

" 'You have been cordially invited to the wedding of-" He stopped and looked like he was trying to inhale his own lips. His eyes bugged out as he stared at what was written after 'wedding'. Kabuto frowned.

"Of?" Taking in a shaky breath, Sasuke finished.

"Hyuuga Neji and Rock Lee." Kabuto fell over while Orochimaru raised his eyebrows.

"The genius and the eyebrows boy?"

"Y-yeah…" Internally, Shikamaru grinned.

_And now all the hassle was worth it, just to see the look on his face._

He gave the Uchiha a minute to regain his composure and ask the question he knew was coming.

"Why give me an invitation? The second I step foot into Konoha, I'll be swarmed by ANBU black ops members and killed."

"Look at the rest of the envelopes contents, moron." Sasuke's eye twitched at being called moron, but he pulled out another sheet of paper from the envelope. He read it in his head first, then read it aloud in the most hateful voice he could muster.

"Uchiha Sasuke has been pardoned into Konoha village for the week of Hyuuga Neji and Rock Lee's wedding. Signed Tsunade, Hokage of Konoha." Orochimaru threw back his head and actually laughed. When he finally stopped, he stood and began to leave, waving to Sasuke over his shoulder.

"Excellent! Bring back some wedding cake for Kabuto and I!" It took a full two seconds for Sasuke to realize what he had said.

"WHAT! I'm not even going!"

"Of course you are! Have fun!" Sasuke's mouth opened and closed, moving to form words he was still trying out in his brain. Finally, he spoke.

"Why the Hell should I go!" Coming up beside him, Shikamaru pointed to the envelope. Inside was another sheet of paper. Kakashi wrote this one. Sasuke read it first, then aloud in that same hateful voice.

" 'If you don't come willingly, Tsunade, Jiraiya, Iruka, Ebiki, Gai, Asuma, Kurenai and myself shall come down to Orochimaru's and drag you back to Konoha ourselves.'" Orochimaru smiled.

"Have fun, Sasuke!" Growling in fury, Sasuke stalked off to his room to pack. Kabuto, confused but still trusting Orochimaru, followed his boss out. As he left, Orochimaru caught Shikamaru's eyes and grinned. The lazy nin grinned back.

_Stage One in plan Aijou Tameni Sasuke is a success and was exacted without casualties._

I'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'amlineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'maline 

Neji fiddled nervously with the front of his kimono (shut up). Behind him, Temari braided his hair.

"Nervous?"

"N-no…" The sand female smiled and waited. The Hyuuga shifted under her gaze before admitting the truth.

"A little…"

"You shouldn't be. You're being married to someone you love with all your friends cheering you on. What's to be nervous about?" Neji smiled slightly and stopped fumbling with his belt.

"I guess you're right. It's just…I've never even _been_ to a wedding, and now I'm having my own." Temari shrugged as she tied a lavender ribbon to hold the braid in place.

"This is Lee's first wedding too, don't forget. He's probably just as nervous as you are." Neji shook his head and smiled even more.

"I doubt it. Lee's pretty good at handling his nervousness."

I'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'amlineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'maline 

"Yup. He passed out." Kankurou poked an unconscious Lee.

"You sure? Maybe he's faking it." Kiba shook his head and crouched next to the sand nin.

"Nope. He's definitely out." Gaara sighed and rubbed his temples. Beside him, Shino watched with certain boredom.

"I don't believe this. Not even _you_ can screw up this badly, Lee." Shino, normally quiet, put in his two cents.

"If he leaves Neji at the altar…" Everyone shivered in horror at the thought. They knew it wouldn't just be Neji who came after Lee's head. The entire Hyuuga clan would turn into psychotic serial killers and come after the eyebrows boy. Kiba bit his lip in worry.

"Come on fuzzy eyebrows! You'll be crushed if you screw this up!" Suddenly, the doors opened and Shikamaru peered in.

"Hey. What's up?" Chouji shrugged nervously.

"Lee passed out." The Nara's eyes bugged out and he lunged in.

"Please tell me this is a joke!" When he saw the unconscious boy, he hit himself in the head.

"Oh, you're shitting me!"

"What?" All heads turned to stare at Sasuke. The Uchiha blinked and look briefly at all of them before concentrating on Lee.

"Please tell me he's going to wake up before the ceremony." Shikamaru slapped the taijutsu specialist in the face several times.

"Someone go get some water. If we don't wake him up in fifteen minutes, the world will end." Sasuke ducked out again, Shino and Kiba quickly following. Kankurou grabbed some smelling salts and tossed them to Shikamaru. Gaara crouched next to the boy and frowned.

"If he doesn't wake up, I opt we fake our deaths, run away to the other side of the globe if possible, change our names, disguise our looks, fake amnesia and never speak of this again."

"Agreed."

I'malineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'amlineI'malineI'malineI'malineI'maline 

"It's not working!" By now, all the boys were panicked. They had three minutes before Lee had to go to the altar. They had tried smelling salts, cold water, hot water, tickling him, pulling at his eyebrows, threats, everything they could think of. Two minutes left. Shikamaru was trying to think of something and had made a dent in the wall where he had hit his head into it.

"I thud don't thud believe thud this thud we're thud gonna thud die thud." Kankurou and Shino were ready to leap out the window. One minute left. Gaara suddenly knelt next to him and pulled his last card out of his sleeve.

"Lee! If you don't wake up and leave Neji at the altar, you will be showing a lack of _youth_!" Lee's eyes sprang open and he leapt up.

"Never! I will most certainly _not_ leave my beloved Neji at the altar! To show my boundless youth, I-" Everyone in the group began to push him out.

"That's great Lee! Ceremony's starting! Move your _butt_!" Somehow, they managed to get up to the altar just in time without looking too bad. Tsunade, whom was acting as priest, raised an eyebrow at Shikamaru. He flashed her a thumbs-up. Gaara leaned against Sasuke, panting slightly. Sasuke leaned back against him, sticking his tongue out a bit. They suddenly exchanged glances and snapped up.

_Oh shit oh shit oh shit oh shit oh_ shit! _It 's Gaara! What the Hell do I do?_

_Damn Uchiha. He's probably come back to seduce Naruto back into his hold then leave him again. Or worse, take him with him! I will_ not _let that happen!_

It got really uncomfortable between them. Kankurou, having noticed, shook his head.

_Dear lord, please help these morons realize their true feelings._

Lee took several deep breaths, trying to calm his nerves.

_Calm down. There's no reason to be nervous. There's no reason to be nervous. There's no reason to-oh. My._ God.

Everyone followed Lee's gaze. Hinata and Tenten, dressed in navy blue kimonos, were the flower girls. Just behind them was Konohomaru with the rings. But that wasn't what Lee was really looking at. Behind Konohomaru, holding his uncle's arm, Neji stood. He was wearing a lavender kimono with dark blue trim. His normal Konoha forehead protector was replaced with a navy blue headband. His cheeks were pink and he was smiling slightly. He looked absolutely spectacular.

Iruka cleared his throat and the flower girls started forward. Konohomaru seemed to be repeating steps in his head as followed them, rings held gently on a velvet pillow. Neji and his uncle were right behind him. Behind Neji were the ladies of honor. (I'm pretty much making this up as I go from here on out.) Ino and Sakura wore the same outfits as Hinata and Tenten, cosmos flowers tucked behind their ears. Temari was behind them, wearing the same outfit, arms linked with Naruto. The blonde was wearing a variation to the girls' outfits, but it was relatively the same. Gaara and Sasuke felt their breaths catch in their throats. It looked really good on him.

As Neji reached the alter, his uncle moved off to the side with Gai. He stood next to his betrothed, looking nervous but very happy. Their eyes met and an understanding passed between them. Tsunade cleared her throat, attracting the attention of everyone gathered.

"Friends, family, and allies…" Gaara nodded.

"We are gathered here to witness and celebrate the bond between Hyuuga Neji and Rock Lee. If anyone has any objections to these two forever sharing their lives with each other, speak now or forever hold their peace wonderful on we go!" A few chuckled. They knew she had been waiting for the two to hook up as long as she had known them. _No one_, unless they were suicidal, stupid, or both, was going to stop the wedding.

"These two have been bound not only by friendship, but by love. Now we gather to acknowledge the love for each other they share. Rock Lee, do you swear to be with Hyuuga Neji, through thick and thin, to protect him with all your being, to comfort him when he is sad, to care for him when he is hurt, to love him for as long as you both shall live?"

"I do." Tsunade beamed.

"Hyuuga Neji, do you swear to be with Rock Lee, through thick and thin, to protect him with all your being, to comfort him when he is sad, to care for him when he is hurt, to love him as long as you both shall live?"

"I do."

"Excellent. Rings?" Konohomaru came up immediately, rings in hand. Lee took one while Neji took the other. Taking the Hyuuga's hand, Lee slipped the ring onto his finger.

"Hyuuga Neji, you are beautiful, intelligent, and at times, a bastard. But I still love you. And I swear to love you forever, in life and death. For all eternity, I will love you and protect you. _Yu-mai aijou_." Neji blushed even more and took Lee's hand.

"Rock Lee, you are honest, sincere, and an idiot. But you're my idiot and I love you. And I swear to love you forever, in life and death. For all eternity, no matter what anyone else says, I will love you and protect you. _Yu-mai aijou._" He slipped the ring on. Tsunade closed the book she had been reading from.

"I now pronounce you _myouto_! Now kiss before I hurt you." They didn't need any encouragement. Lee leaned Neji over and kissed him full on the lips. Everyone stood and clapped happily. The newly wed and happy couple waltzed down the aisle. Temari linked arms with Tenten and Hinata, following them. Ino and Sakura walked together, kidnapping and taking Kankurou with them. As he passed, Kankurou whispered to Gaara.

"Work, work, work." The redhead chuckled. Shikamaru and Chouji left together while Shino and Kiba linked arms. Naruto smiled happily at Sasuke and Gaara.

"Do I get an escort?" The two boys exchanged looks and took either side of Naruto, walking down the aisle with him, arms linked with his. Tsunade followed, Hinata's father and Gai right behind her.

End of Chapter Two

A/N: There's one more after this. Then there's the sequel. evil chuckle Shikamaru's not the _only_ one with a PLAN.

Yu-mai-aijou: You are my love

Myouto: Husband and wife


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: OMG…a third chapter…

**SilverWing129: chuckles evilly and rubs hands together** Yes, a sequel, and a PLAN.

**Dark-Princess-Hikari: **Thank you! I've been trying to find his freaking name for so long!

Chapter Three: Hiyokunotori! Nimo, Shikamaru no Tsumori o Dousa! (The Happily Married Couple! Also, Shikamaru's Plan in Action!)

The reception was held in the back courtyard. Everyone and their third cousin had come to see the marriage between a Hyuuga and someone not in the clan. Neji and Lee, happy they had gotten through it without any mishaps (that the former knew about), were content to sit with each other and watch people celebrate. Naruto served them both cake, declaring that since it was their wedding, they got first taste. Kiba got to make the honorary ninja-wedding joke.

"Yeah, and they get to see if it's poisoned." Everyone laughed. It wasn't, however, poisoned, and the couple got to have their cake and eat it too. There were actually five cakes and Iruka apologized.

"We got a little carried away with the food." Not that anyone minded, the cakes were great. About halfway into the reception, Temari, Tenten and Naruto dragged Neji onto the makeshift stage. Temari produced a crown made of white flowers that were native to Suna.

"We, the ladies of honor and Naruto, present Hyuuga Neji with the flowered crown. It's a tradition from Suna to show we have faith that their love will overcome all obstacles with the elegance and grace this crown represents. May your days together be limitless." Everyone clapped as Temari placed the crown on Neji's head. The girls turned to Naruto, who motioned Lee over.

"Also, we would like to be the first to present the couple with a present." The blonde produced a prettily wrapped box. On it was a small card. Lee read it aloud while Neji tried not to smile too much.

" 'This ought to be useful on the honeymoon.'" The two males exchanged glances and opened it. Inside was a bottle of expensive, jasmine-scented lotion.

"…I'm going to hurt you, Naruto-kun." The ladies of honor and Naruto burst into laughter, everyone else joining in. The girls (and Naruto) were thanked and everything began progressing as normal. Shikamaru, sitting off to the side, winked at Temari. She returned the gesture, having been informed of the PLAN.

_Stage two and three completed with no casualties. Good job, Temari._

The couple received a number of gifts. Kakashi explained to them that he _would_ have gotten them the complete set of Icha Icha Paradise, but Iruka had threatened to hurt him badly. So instead he got them a picture of the Genin teams when they were younger. Gaara and his siblings were in the picture as well. Everyone was wearing some form of furry ears.

"I thought we'd lost this picture! Thank you, Kakashi-sensei!" The jounin smiled.

"You should thank Iruka-sensei too. He helped me find it." Hiashi got them a new house.

"I thought you might want to live in your own space." Neji nearly strangled him with love. Gaara presented them with two lockets. In one locket there was a picture of Neji and in the other was Lee. The sand nin, flanked by Naruto and Sasuke, presented them to the couple.

"Apparently, it's a tradition from Suna. It's so that if you're ever apart, you can still think about each other." Neji beamed and refrained from hugging the Kazekage. Lee did not. He let go when Naruto poked him and told him that Gaara's face was turning blue.

"Ah, sorry! Thank you, Gaara-sama!"

"I only bought them. Naruto's the one who found out about it." Naruto was hugged too. The blonde beckoned to Sasuke, who presented them with a soft blanket.

"Technically, it's from Orochimaru. He said it would be good for curling up together in the winter." He was thanked too. Naruto took Sasuke and Gaara's hands and dragged them off to go get cake. Lee and Neji watched them go, then looked at each other.

"Do you think Shikamaru's PLAN will work? (I can't seem to stop writing PLAN in all caps.)"

"It should. Most of the work has already been done by them." Lee nodded and they went to get Jell-O. As was tradition, the wife was supposed to dance with her father. Technically, there _wasn't_ a wife, even though Neji had decided he would play that part. Another problem was the one playing the wife role didn't have a father. Luckily, Hiashi agreed to dance with him. It was a little strange, but it made Neji feel better nonetheless. And as Tsunade put it, she had just married a Hyuuga to a bushy-browed non-Hyuuga. No one really cared what was strange anymore.

Finally, everyone had eaten, danced, presented gifts to the couple, and made general merriment. It was time to send the couple off on their honeymoon. Before they left, Temari grabbed Neji and whispered something to him. He grinned and nodded. Lee pretended he didn't know what was going on. As Kankurou helped them into the carriage, Neji pulled the crown from his head and turned to the people gathered. As was tradition for all marriages, he tossed the crown into the crowd. All the girls gathered scrambled to grab it while Naruto, in between Gaara and Sasuke, unlinked his arms and caught it. Shikamaru grinned.

"Guess we know who's getting married next!" The blonde turned beet red, but smiled. Neji and Lee grinned at each other before closing the door to their carriage and riding off. Temari looked smugly at her brother, who flashed her a thumbs up. Gaara and Sasuke blushed a bit as Naruto put the grown on his head and re-linked their arms.

"Who wants to tell Orochimaru that the PLAN to hook up those three worked?"

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Neji leaned against Lee, resting his head on the taller male's shoulder.

"You think it worked?" Smiling, Lee slipped an arm around Neji's shoulders.

"I think it went perfectly. And…" The Hyuuga raised an eyebrow. Lee grinned wolfishly.

"You look great in that outfit, but I can't wait to take it off."

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"…Your family really doesn't shirk on the luxury, do they?"

"No, I guess they don't." The two were standing inside the house that had been supplied by the Hyuuga clan for the honeymoon. It was big. Like really big. Naruto could mass Kage no Bunshin to his hearts content and there would _still_ be room. They wandered around for a bit before Lee gave up exploring, swept Neji off his feet, and carried him to their bedroom. He had the bottle of lotion Naruto and the girls gave them in his pocket. He intended to make good use of it. Once in the bedroom, he closed the door and laid Neji on the bed.

"Neji-san, I-"

"Koi." Lee blinked in surprise. Blushing a bit, Neji scratched the side of his face.

"I want you to call me Neji-koi." The bushy-browed male grinned and kissed Neji gently.

"Neji-koi, I want to make love to you. I've wanted it for so many years. But I can wait just a little longer to show you one of my _other_ skills that never came in handy as a ninja." The Hyuuga blushed and nodded.

"Go ahead." Beaming, Lee kissed Neji again and began to slowly disrobe him. He gently removed the kimono and placed it on the ground, kissing his lovers chest.

"Turn onto your stomach." So nervous he was trembling, Neji did as he was told. He heard Lee strip off his own clothes and shift so that he was slightly on top of him. Something cold was placed on his back and he shivered. The coldness was replaced by warm hands that ran over his back, relaxing knots he didn't even know he had. He shivered, this time in pleasure, and moaned. It felt _so_ good to have Lee massage his back.

_I'll have to treat Naruto to dinner for getting that lotion. The girls too._

**Ya'll, this is a T-rated story. I can't post any sex scenes, so this is as far as it goes. Use you imaginations. Hell, even write your own sex scene about what you think happens. But I can't post one. Sorry about the inconvenience.**

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As it turned out, Neji couldn't treat Naruto to dinner for getting the lotion. When he and Lee got back from their honeymoon (most of which was spent having sex), they found out Naruto had taken Gaara and Sasuke to his house and they had yet to come out. At first they thought they were all dead. Temari and Kankurou went to check on them, and when they knocked on the door a tired, mussed-up Gaara stripped to his boxers answered. The two quickly apologized, dropped off some food, and ran off to tell everyone the PLAN had in fact worked.

"So it'll be a while before I can treat Naruto-kun to dinner, huh?" Kakashi, reading Icha Icha Paradise, nodded.

"Yup." Tsunade had to write three more day pardons so that the ANBU wouldn't kill Sasuke. Neji and Lee got used to their new home (by having sex in almost every room of the house) and life began to progress as normal. Three nights later, Kakashi spotted Sasuke stumble out of the house. He was fully clothed and had a huge, stupid grin on his face. The silver-haired jounin called out to him.

"Finally leaving, Sasuke-kun?" The Uchiha, still grinning, shook his head.

"Nope. Grocery shopping." The older male raised an eyebrow.

"And Naruto-kun's not going…because?"

"He can't walk."

"…Why." Looking smug and goofy at the same time, Sasuke grinned.

"Wouldn't _you_ like to know."

"…You've been having crazy hot sex in every room of that house with Naruto and Gaara, haven't you."

"Yes, yes I have."

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Neji and Lee cuddled together in bed, both drenched in sweat and other juices the rating of the story forbids me to specify. Their clothes were strewn across the house, starting in the living room, leading up the stairs, through the hallway and into their room. Lee kissed Neji's forehead. His lips lingered briefly before he pulled back.

"Neji-koi?" The sleepy Hyuuga didn't open his eyes and his smile didn't falter.

"Hm?"

"I love you."

"Mm. Love you too, hon." Grinning, Lee reached down and pulled the blanket over them. Neji curled up closer to him and began to purr. Lee wrapped his arms around his lover and buried his face into Neji's hair, falling asleep. Next to the bed, on the ground, lay an empty bottle. It _used_ to hold jasmine scented lotion. Neji cracked an eye open and used the Byakugan to glance at it.

…_Gonna need to get more of that._

End

A/N: Now I get to write…the sequel! Maniacal laughter ensues


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